My First Time
Eric Forman
The first time that I tried weed put the entire plot line of The Hangover film series into context. It suddenly seemed plausible that the combo of drugs and alcohol could make somebody forget an entire night. While the first time that I tried weed didn’t end up in me losing my best friend, it did give me a spiritual grounding that I’ve never experienced before.
Last week, on July 10th I ripped my first bong. It wasn’t all fun and roses, in fact it really fucken hurt. As I was new to bong smoking, I got my friend to light it. I didn’t tell her that it was my first time smoking a bong, so I shouldn’t have been surprised when she proceeded to give me a very long hit. I wasn’t prepared for the mad rush of smoke into my lungs after she removed the plug so bong water suddenly made a home across the walls in her room.
After the hit I couldn’t stop coughing, thinking in this crazed state that I had officially committed a felony. I could feel the smoke coiling around my esophagus, and while my friend said that this was the fastest way to get high, I couldn’t help but feel scarred by the experience.
After the coughing died down I quickly began to taste this curious, flavourful sensation right at the back of my tongue. Googling these symptoms, I realised to my relief that it wasn’t the onset of chlamydia, but that I was about to hit the high of my life. In preparation I got up to start playing some lo-fi hip hop and sat back, waiting for the ride to begin.
My first adventure being high can only be described as a one-way trip through vibe land. Vibrations echoed in my soul and I found myself being carried alongside the beat. At one point I could feel myself playing the guitar with the music. Being a music lover, it was perhaps one of my favorite experiences listening to music. For the first time in my life, I truly felt relaxed.
After this trip my mind began to slow down. I was like Clooney in Gravity floating alone through space. After a while, I began to have the munchies, so naturally I grabbed the biggest bag of nacho chips that I could find. That’s when the slow motion kicked in. It felt so natural to be eating these chips slowly. With every crunch I could taste new flavor profiles. I could feel each chip latch onto my tongue in a way that I had never felt before. I was in an explosive romance with each bite; I didn’t know whether I was Anastasia or Grey but I definitely still wanted more.
After this experience I decided that it was time for bed, so I decided to chill out by watching some of The Emperor's New Groove. This was one of my favourite experiences of the night as I found every song, character and plot twist deeply fulfilling and comedic. By the end I was completely chilled out and proceeded to have the deepest sleep of my life.
I can count the number of times that I have tried weed on one hand. I come from a family dead set against it, so there’s always been a part of me which wanted to try it. I’ve simply never understood why ‘boomers’ disagree with the ethics of weed when they’re more than willing to drink each night, fucking up their liver and call it relaxation.
When people talk about getting high, they all have different experiences. For me, I just let the experience flow naturally without having expectations.
To be honest, weed was the cheapest entertainment that I’ve had in awhile.