Lauren’s Declassified Hangover Survival Guide

Words by Lauren Pemberton (she/her)

Hangovers fucking suck. While I’m past my fresher days,  I’m still a fan of hitting town and flat parties. This comes with the grim reality of the next morning. Everyone has their own way of curing their bender blues. Amongst the eons of hacks one can find on the internet, there can be trash and magic! I’ll be rating hangover hacks so that you don’t have to. 

1. Can’t Beat the Classic… Salty and Fatty Foods

A staple in the hangover hack pantry… I give you salty and fatty foods. At the end of the night, there is nothing like chowing down on some chips, crackers, or fish fingers. A good feed with your mates before heading home for the night can also help you wind down, and you can end the night with some good yarns. The salts and fats are also great to vibe with in the morning as you’re soaking in the disappointment and cringe from the night before. Salty and fatty foods are a total win. 

2. The Legendary Hair of The Dog Hack

This is when someone cures their hangover by drinking more! The phrase refers to the method of treating a dog bite where the dog’s hair is placed in the wound. In the same way, continuously drinking supposedly prevents you from getting a hangover in the short term. All I’ll say is that while it works, it just prolongs the horrible hangover to come. For a temporary situation it could be handy, but you’re honestly better off chugging a tall glass of water.

3. Honey, Honey, Honey!

Honey on a piece of toast or a cracker isn’t just a sweet treat, but a great hangover snack too. Eating it before or after drinking will help because it metabolises the alcohol in your system (whatever that means, Google!). I recommend spooning it onto the bread or cracker before you get home, so you don’t fumble around with a sticky jar and miss out! Overall, it’s nice and it works, but it’s not as tasty as salty and fatty foods.

4. The Favourite: Electrolyte Powder

TRIED. TESTED. WORKED. One night when things got too crazy, I got in an Uber at 2 a.m. with a bottle of water and electrolyte powder in my hand. I chugged half before bed and the rest the next morning… and I felt so energized that I gymmed at 10 a.m., hangover-free! Drinking makes you lose a lot of water and electrolytes, so this is a fool-proof cure. Powerade works similarly, as it contains electrolytes too. But tbh, electrolyte powder and water gets the job done. Vibe check passed.

5. Hangover Tablets (Yep, They Exist)

Aspirin tablets are old news. Hangover tablets are here baby! You can find them at your local liquor store at the counter—and they work! Just chug a glass of water with two tablets before bed. However, it’s a bit expenny and there are cheaper remedies (like the ones above!).