Navigating Healthcare While Being Gender Fluid

Words by Teddi (he/she/they)

My parents raised my siblings and I without gender stereotypes. Neither of my parents conform to traditional gender roles and they didn’t want to place limits on our expression, so they raised us the same. Until university, I wasn’t really aware that there were identities such as non-binary and gender fluid. No one in my life up until that point used these labels. Even if I heard about a celebrity coming out, it seemed very removed from me. I paid it no mind.

I was asked about my gender and pronouns for the first time in 2020, to which I replied something along the lines of, “I’ve never really thought about it.” But that led me to think about it. It wasn’t a straight line to get here, but I am happy with identifying as gender fluid. My experience of gender can fluctuate greatly day to day. I use all pronouns and am happiest with people mismatching them. 

I personally think there should be another label aside from ‘cis’ and ‘trans’, which I call ‘default gender’. It is for people who have never thought about their gender, because I’m over the automatic assumption that everyone is cis until they think otherwise. I don’t believe that if you have never thought about your gender then you are cis, because how would you really know? Everyone should have a little gender crisis as a treat. 

In being disabled, I do think the relationship we have with our bodies is fundamentally different. When ill, I’m left unable to do anything except think about life. It’s both a blessing and a curse. 

My body doesn’t determine my gender. I have always been who I am. The difference is that I now have the language to explain it. That being said, having a condition that is associated with a specific gender is a bit hard. Ovarian cysts and endometriosis force me to reside in spaces designed for women when I am not one. While I can change people’s perspectives of me with how I present and the labels I choose, people will look at me and call me a woman if their knowledge of gender is limited. 

To get my records to show I am trans, it required a couple of phone calls. If you are under the care of the hospital, then the department can change your records for you. But as I found, this only changes your records in certain areas of the hospital. When I was in ED, I got the chronic pain department to change my records, but some gyne records would still state ‘F’ as my gender marker. The gyne department is limited because it is designed around cis women. But another phone call clarified my records. They didn’t require any paperwork to change my gender, unlike a name change.  

Other places that use your health records, such as a private practice or your general practitioner, will each need a phone call to change it. There are a surprising number of calls required, because even though all the systems are connected, they won’t automatically update and will need to be done manually. 

Changing your gender marker will change how your care is accessed. I’ve found that gender-affirming care will be brought up in relevant departments without prompting. While this consideration is great, sometimes it can feel like a checkbox to doctors that assume all gender minorities want certain gender affirming healthcare. If you have a good team of doctors, family, and friends, they will be doing everything to support you and your health journey.