HOW TO BUY DRUGS ONLINE (FAST)
Words by The Salient Lizard (nang/nong)
Unless you’re someone's mum who voted ‘no’ on the referendum, you’ll know that, no matter how legal they are, drugs are everywhere in this city.
Before uni, I got any substance via the trickle-down drug effect. Until I was 18, I got alcohol this way too. “Oooh what are you drinking? Can I have a sip?” The trickle-down effect is knowing someone who knows someone and you’re sussed. If ykyk.
So, what happens if you don’t know someone, or if your chain-link breaks? Well, my friend, you have to go directly to the source: the black market.
I’m not here to convince you to buy drugs. If you’re on the fence, just don’t. But, if you’re already on the path, here’s the downlow.
I first uncovered drugs Discord in 2020. It unlocked a whole new world. There were subservers for everything—weed, acid, prescription ritalin and zopiclone under a tab called ‘pharma’. People were even selling sizzurp, and crack under the ‘ice’ tab.
By asking around in the Salient office, I have come to the conclusion that there are probably drugs lurking in the back rooms of every social media platform. Two Salient staffers reported being part of weed dealing gcs on Snapchat, of all places.
The Zuck has got drugs being distributed on Instagram and Facebook, mostly catering to the chronically ill community. A Salient contributor admitted to scoring edibles off a green fairy using a fake Facebook account. Another Salient staffer got edibles off Instagram users who would speak in code via their stories to alert buyers to fresh stock.
You’re ready to find drugs. Where do you start?
You need to know the substance you’re wanting, and what it’s for. Is it to relax, support chronic pain, or to party?
Find the most drug-experienced person you know, and ask this person to get you added to a group. This might be obvious, but protect your identity—no real names or pictures.
If you can’t find a group and you’re looking for weed, do a key word search on Facebook or Instagram. Get ready for expenny prices! If it’s oils, gummies, or lollipops, they’ll probably ship them to you. I’ve had weed products shipped to me many a time. As long as it’s not straight bud, it’ll be fine.
If you get into the Discord, get ready to talk the talk. Get your Discord friend to run you through drug slang. Get ready to call everyone bro.
Got the dealer to agree? Sweet as. Get cash, find a friend to sneakily loiter somewhere and watch the deal happen, and dress masc (hoodies, baggy clothes, no makeup).
Choose an address for the deal zone that’s safe and isn’t your house. An apartment block with a central address is a good option.
Ask for the colour and type of car the dealer has. Tell them the colour of the baggy attire you are wearing. When you spot them, come up to the window of the car. They may let you collect and exchange cash from the front window. But you’ll most likely have to get in the backseat, depending on the foot traffic around the deal zone.
The drug dealers I’ve contacted online have been kind, or at least not talkative. The weirdest experience I’ve had was buying acid for the first time. The guy looked 17, which was concerning. But as a femme person picking up at night, it was a nice surprise that he wasn’t creepy and old.
All of this said, buying off the black market is risky, I won’t lie to you. But most Discord servers have a feedback tab, so if you get ripped off or a dealer makes you uncomfortable at least you can ruin their reputation afterwards.